Shark shark shark (bebemochi) wrote,
Shark shark shark

2010 -- Helluva year.

Something I wrote on IG, figured I could repost here.

Hey cats and kittens,

Y'all ever have one of those years that you just know you'll always remember? 2010 is definitely gonna be that year for me. I've never had so much happen to me all at once before.

The bad stuff:

1) Possibly the most heart-breaking thing to ever happen to me -- in September, my mother passed away very suddenly from an aortic dissection. She and I were extremely close. Ever since I'd become an "adult," we'd been as much friends as mother and daughter. Her absence from my life is a yawning maw of pain I have to confront every day.

2) The cause of my mother's death was congenital, a mutated gene that contributed to weakened tissue in the aorta. We were aware that her family had this mutated gene -- my mother was scheduled to be tested for it literally a week after her sudden death. I was tested instead, and I have it as well. With care and treatment I will have a normal lifespan, but it's very sobering to confront your own mortality like that. It's been a difficult thing to absorb for both my husband and me.

3) Actually, in early 2011, but I'm going to attribute it to 2010 anyways... our first ferret, Zoku, passed away. He was almost 9 years old. It was time for him to go, but it was very difficult to let him go, especially for my husband. We all miss him very much.

4) My mother's death has exacerbated issues my father has -- depression, hoarding tendencies, addiction... we're to the point where we need to plan an intervention, which is terrifying. None of us -- his close friends and family -- know how to proceed or even if it will do any good.

There have been some good things, though:

1) Chronologically, in May, we bought our first house -- built in 1928 in an excellent neighborhood near a beautiful park. We managed to afford more house in a better neighborhood than we expected because it's quite the fixer-upper, but we're happy with our progress so far and continue to improve.

2) Really, the best, and most important thing, the thing that is so amazing it's a welcome challenge to adequately express -- the same day we closed on our house, Brian and I became pregnant. About three weeks ago on December 30th I gave birth to Max, our little boy. When I heard him cry, it was like a lightning bolt struck my heart. Fortunately my husband was able to take bonding leave, so we've been the three of us together, building the little routine of our family, since Max's birth. He is an absolutely gorgeous boy, looks just like his daddy, and we couldn't be happier.

So you can see why 2010 is gonna go down in my history books. I didn't make any resolutions this year, to be honest -- I am just sending my gentle hopes for a peaceful year into the cosmos. I wish you all the same.
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